I can't say it was unexpected, or even really a surprise. I
mean, he's been very heavy on my mind, and we have an interesting
connection with each other. When we were together, many moons ago, he
could finish my sentences. Not everyone could do that.
When my phone rang, and I saw it was him, I had an idea of what he was going to say. Still, I braced myself for the blow, but it never came. Oh, the words I knew were coming came, but they were delivered gently, almost sweetly. Instead of hurting, they were healing. It gave a closure that our previous episode never had. Maybe because he delivered the message and not the other way around. Maybe because in spite of my enjoyment of him, I knew it was temporary, and I wasn't as invested as the last time. Maybe because both of us are in a better place and state of mind. Yes, I want to analyze it. It's human nature to do so. My heart was open, but so are my eyes.
I wouldn't call him monogamous, but he does prefer one serious sexual-type relationship at a time, and because both of us had been hurt by our last go round, and he was fresh out of a relationship this time, I agreed that there should be no strings attached. Still, I worried that I would fall in Love all over again. Fortunately, it seemed that even though the years melted away, my heart was focused on protecting itself. We had a a session that was pleasant, but not overwhelming, and we made plans to see each other again. His MIL fell into bad health, my MIL got worse and died, so we kept postponing, until we agreed to not plan anything soon. That was 2 months ago.
It was just yesterday that thoughts of him entered my head, and I realized that I missed him, but I knew he wasn't going to come back. At least, not how we had discussed.So, the phone rang. I answered it, and I heard his words. I said I understand (I do) I said I wasn't hurt (I'm not) and I admitted that I hoped this time we wouldn't lose our friendship. He agreed. Will it really` happen that way? I honestly don't know, bit I do know that I will make my services available to him, and that "she" isn't into BDSM, so there's a chance it will wind up that we see each other. Do I really` want that? No, but only because I wish him all the happiness he can have in this relationship.
I have other things to focus on, so I'll go back to those. I wish you all the best Spike. I'll never forget the sweet way you delivered the news to me, and I thank you for your respect.
M
When my phone rang, and I saw it was him, I had an idea of what he was going to say. Still, I braced myself for the blow, but it never came. Oh, the words I knew were coming came, but they were delivered gently, almost sweetly. Instead of hurting, they were healing. It gave a closure that our previous episode never had. Maybe because he delivered the message and not the other way around. Maybe because in spite of my enjoyment of him, I knew it was temporary, and I wasn't as invested as the last time. Maybe because both of us are in a better place and state of mind. Yes, I want to analyze it. It's human nature to do so. My heart was open, but so are my eyes.
I wouldn't call him monogamous, but he does prefer one serious sexual-type relationship at a time, and because both of us had been hurt by our last go round, and he was fresh out of a relationship this time, I agreed that there should be no strings attached. Still, I worried that I would fall in Love all over again. Fortunately, it seemed that even though the years melted away, my heart was focused on protecting itself. We had a a session that was pleasant, but not overwhelming, and we made plans to see each other again. His MIL fell into bad health, my MIL got worse and died, so we kept postponing, until we agreed to not plan anything soon. That was 2 months ago.
It was just yesterday that thoughts of him entered my head, and I realized that I missed him, but I knew he wasn't going to come back. At least, not how we had discussed.So, the phone rang. I answered it, and I heard his words. I said I understand (I do) I said I wasn't hurt (I'm not) and I admitted that I hoped this time we wouldn't lose our friendship. He agreed. Will it really` happen that way? I honestly don't know, bit I do know that I will make my services available to him, and that "she" isn't into BDSM, so there's a chance it will wind up that we see each other. Do I really` want that? No, but only because I wish him all the happiness he can have in this relationship.
I have other things to focus on, so I'll go back to those. I wish you all the best Spike. I'll never forget the sweet way you delivered the news to me, and I thank you for your respect.
M
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