Confession Time

This really isn't much of a confession as it is an admission of failure.

As far as I can remember, the last time I engaged in intercourse was sometime around Thanksgiving. in fact, that was the last time I received any sexual stimulation at all.

You see, boys and girls, I don't masturbate. Well, that's a half-truth. Let's just say that I masturbate once a year or so. I usually do it when I've been having LOTS of sex, and I want that good feeling to continue. I'll orgasm to the point of exhaustion, then sleep for a long time. It's a good happy feeling. My orgasms come rapidly, and I recover quickly. I never have "just one."

Keeping that in mind, last night I decided it had been long enough, and I was going to take matters into my own hands. I was going to masturbate! I read some sexy stories online, then went into the bathroom. I made some ginger paste to stimulate myself in hopes that I'd come quickly. I used a gloved hand and spread the paste on, and I enjoyed the tingle and heat. Then I went into the shower to rinse it off, and I used a toy that usually results in rapid fire orgasms. Only... well, only nothing happened. I didn't even get that "feel good" happiness that will show up when I'm too tired to cum.

I tried. I really tried. I spent the better part of an hour doing what I could to get there, but nothing worked. I finally gave up and went to bed frustrated. So, this morning, when Shilo came home from work, I told him I had a confession to make. He was obviously confused, because I tell him everything anyway. I get the feeling he was imagining something horrible, and he was relieved it wasn't anything bad, but I think he also felt sorry for me. Hell, I felt sorry for myself!

Anyway, with that conversation over, we both went to sleep for a while, and I got up about 10 to start my day, leaving him to sleep. I just feel stupid. I mean, I should have known that I wouldn't orgasm. I guess I'll just have to wait until someone wants me, because taking matters into my own hands is a huge waste of time.

Now that I've admitted that, I feel even more stupid. Laugh if you want. ♥