Again With The Horses

This time, excerpts from the horse's mouth! No, not one horse, several of them. Due to the anomic aphasia, some words might be eliminated or changed, but I will strive to keep the meaning the same.

Name of horse:Child #4 (Babyman)
What was said: "Dad called and said he's not gonna challenge you and Auntie in court next week."
What it means to me: Well, I'm more than a little suspicious... What does he (Deadbeat) have in mind anyway?


Name of horse: Me (to Babyman)
What was said:"I'm going to listen to your voicemail from him."
What it means to me: Well, I couldn't believe it was really true, so I listened to it. Decided I'd call him (Deadbeat) and catch him off-guard.


Name of horse: Child #2 (Boo Bear)
What was said: "I ordered parts for my car so I can fix it all the way and get it out of your driveway."
What it means to me: Finally! After 4 months, it would be nice to not have to park our cars on the street!


Name of horse: Soft Kitty (A sub I was considering)
What was said: "If BDSM isn't sexual for you, then I can't submit to you."
What it means to me: Honestly??? Well after the whole back and forth of the past 3 weeks where he couldn't make up his mind on anything, I'm kind of relieved.


Name of horse: Me (to Soft Kitty)
What was said: "I'm the Dominant, and since you are now seeking another one, please block me so I don't have to watch."
What it means to me: Relief, Honestly, I'm relieved. It was getting to be too much work to get even a little cooperation.


Name of horse: Smartest Horse up until sometime back (needs a new name)
What was said: "I guess I didn't Love you nearly as much as you Loved me, but I do care for you."
What it means to me: OUCH!!!  Well, not really... I had my suspicions. Things had been tanking fast back then, and if it hadn't ended the way it did, it would have ended for a myriad of other reasons, and the time he was in the pasture was good for me, and a little heartbreak every now and then is good.


Name of horse: Me (to Horse that needs new name)
What was said: "I'm looking forward to riding your ass."
What it means to me: Well, I am... We enjoyed our rides before, so why would this be different? Oh yeah... He's been in the pasture, and I'm in a completely different headspace. I'm a little anxious/nervous, but I'm sure the horse hasn't completely forgotten how to make me purr in delight.


Name of horse:Me (to myself)
What was said: "Must stay calm, and stop counting down."
What it means to me: well, it's a habit, and I'm understandably feeling that way. I'm afraid (scared shitless) of how we will react to each other


Name of horse: Me (to Horse that needs new name)
What was said: "I'll let you take the lead in the emotion department."
What it means to me: WTF???!!! This isn't like me at all! I'm already putting up my emotional guards.


Name of horse: Shilo
What was said: "You've got a boyfriend" (said in a sing-song voice)
What it means to me: He's teasing me in a good-natured way. It's his way of showing approval, but he doesn't want me to get hurt. I don't know how or if I should reassure him. Opening my heart means I run that risk. I will try to not obsess too much. (Too late!)


Name of horse: Babyman
What was said: "I don't worry about your relationship with Stitch anymore."
What it means to me: He's finally understanding that polyamory can work.


Name of horse: Deadbeat
What was said: "I decided to not fight you and your sister in court next week."
What it means to me: I have mixed feelings. All this has been nearly 9 months in the making, and it's taken this long because he kept fighting it. So, while I'm relieved, I'm also angry because of all the time, energy, and money spent on what could have been solved MONTHS ago!


Name of horse: Stitch
What was said: "I Love you babygirl, and I'm so glad we're alone."
What it means to me: What he's really saying is that he's glad I took Babyman home today. Having him here cramps our lifestyle. I agree 100%, but I love my time with Babyman.


Name of horse: Me (to anyone reading this)
What was said: "I Love all my children, and they mean the world to me."
What it means to me: Just what I wrote. It's just that I'm out of the closet now in most areas, but I don't feel comfortable doing more than hugging Stitch or Shilo with them around, and I most certainly can't run around the house naked with them at the house.

Name of horse: Daddy W (in reference to Horse that needs new name)
What was said: "I want all the best for you, and I know you're out, so maybe things will be better for you two now."
What it means to me: I'm just really happy to have his approval and guidance.

Name of horse: Me and Horse that needs new name
What was said: "NSA is best for now."
What it means to me: I'm trying to protect my heart, and I think he is too.

Name of horse: Me (to myself)
What was said: "I can't believe all this stuff has gluten in it."
What it means to me: Exactly that, Feeding Shilo is getting more difficult, and I hate reading labels, but I know it will pay off.

Name of horse: Daddy W (in reference to Soft Kitty)
What was said: "Maybe you wanted it too bad and rushed it and that scared him."
What it means to me:I agree, but it was his (Soft kitty's) indecisiveness that finally made me give up.

Name of horse: Baby Sister
What was said: "I'm glad he (Deadbeat) finally gave up, but I'm pissed about all the work."
What it means to me: Me too! I completely agree!

Name of horse: Neurologist
What was said: "The Specialist and I were discussing changing Babyman's meds. How do you feel?"
What it means to me: Not again! Too much work! Let's stay with this cocktail for a while.


Name of horse: Banker (I was trying to close an account AGAIN!)
What was said: (A whole series of irrelevant questions)
What it means to me: This is why I hate people. I'm too antisocial for this!


Name of horse: Stitch
What was said: What's for Dinner?
What it means to me: OOPS! Time to get off the computer!

But I have one final horse...


Name of horse: Random sub male on collarspace
What was said: "Will UB my Domme? How much do U charge?"
What it means to me: Oh Gawd NO! I'm getting sick of this!

My REAL reply: No, I'm not an elephant or a prostitute. (figure it out reader)


Okay, off to fix a gluten-free meal!