A (Pre)Christmas Miracle And Intervention

FACTS:

1. Shilo is stubborn, often to his detriment.

2. I am stubborn as well, especially if I am right, or telling the truth.

3. There are times when NO amount of reasoning works with Shilo.

4. On the rare occasion when this happens, I feel I have no choice but to put it in writing.

5. When I put something in writing, the "noise" stops, and he has to focus on the subject without any interruption.

When I wrote "Loathing In The House Of The Laughing Sun" (https://keepcalmanddowhatmerrytellsyou.blogspot.com/2020/12/loathing-in-house-of-laughing-sun.html) it was my way of getting his undivided attention.  Unfortunately, it didn't work, and things became even more unbearable. In what I guess was a last-ditch effort to "rescue" Christmas, Sunshine took over. She adores Shilo, and Shilo has a special Love for Sunshine. This mutuality allows for Sunshine to ask questions that I never would, and express feelings that are muddled and deep within me. She asks the hard questions and shares our (hers and mine) fears in a way where whether or not he agrees, he is in a place of careful listening and consideration.

Unless she (Sunshine) chooses to share what they discuss, I am blissfully ignorant, and Shilo knows he can tell her whatever he wants without fear or concern of my knowledge. Sunshine also tells my "secrets" which means that he will often know things that I don't necessarily want him to know yet. It's a safe place for the both of them. Speaking of "safe places" Sunshine will come out and show up to "protect" me, mostly to prevent my feelings from being hurt, but also to protect me from any number of painful things. So, that was her reasoning for coming out on Sunday night and staying out until early Tuesday morning. 

When I came out I was sad. Sadder than I've been in a long while, and it's lingering. I still have a "crying headache,"  and she posted about "Thinking so hard" that she had a headache on Facebook sometime Monday. Still not sure what It all means. The "good" news is that Sunshine convinced Shilo that I need a Happy Christmas, so Shilo promised her that he would call a truce until after then, and then go day by day  (minute by minute?) after that.

I know that Shilo still probably feels how he did earlier, but I also know that this truce might last long enough that we can get through this and maybe even fix whatever pain we're dealing with. I know there is Love, and that hasn't changed. I know that we walked into our relationship and marriage with both eyes open, and I hope we can get through this rough patch by holding on to one another and trusting that things will get better.

For now, I'm happy that my anger is gone, and I'll be happy to be rid of this headache.

Loathing In The House Of The Laughing Sun

I'm trying, I've tried. As far as I know, I've done my very best. I don't lie to Shilo, and other than the occasional sadness or worries about things, I don't hide things from him. It's perfect. Well, except for now.

There is insanity creeping in. I don't know if it's because of us being stuck at home due to the continuing COVID-19 stay at home orders, or something else. All I do know is that there's no reasoning with crazy, and that crazy eventually rubs off onto everything and everyone else. People who know me best know that while I can be social when necessary, I much prefer being quiet at home. Oh! and hugs! I am a hugger. I enjoy physical contact, but on my conditions. Obviously, I'm not getting nearly enough hugs. This adds to my depression and anxiety. Again, due to the COVID-19 restrictions, I don't see people who I used to see ALL the time. This includes "Master B." Sure, we've seen each other a few times, but due to the potential health risks, we have made a conscious decision to not see each other. It suits us well. Over the time we've been in a relationship, we have gone through long periods of time (3+ months) where we didn't see each other. We're also guilty of having a lack of communication, in that we will go for weeks without talking to each other on the phone or even emailing each other or texting. It's just how we are in our relationship. Again, this is NOT a big deal. Not for us, anyway. We’re both confident and comfortable with it.

Do I miss "Master B?" Sure I miss him, but not in the same longing for him way that I have missed Shilo when we’ve been apart. Like it or not, I’m very attached to Shilo. Unfortunately, Shilo has been extremely difficult lately. Aggressive, disagreeable, argumentative, and he’s been making my life a living hell. I know he’s going to see this, but I’m not concerned about that. What I am concerned about is his reason. Why is he acting like this? What (real or imagined) thing has happened to cause this? I asked him last night. I’m past frustration, and I’ve gotten to the point of exasperation with his behavior, and his answer didn’t make things any better. What is Shilo’s reason for mistreating me, you ask? Brace yourselves, people. This is good. In his (Shilo’s) words taken from his blog (https://merryslavesdiary.blogspot.com/2020/12/15-december-tuesday-diary-hfc-70.html)

“A feeling of ..anger..and resentment... building up within me, based on my belief that she would rather be with B than with me.”

That’s it! That’s what he thinks, and NONE OF IT is based on reality. It’s all his thinking and imagination, and I’m being punished for it. And, yes, this is punishing for me. The anger and resentment being displayed hurts me to the core, and he knows it, and he doesn’t care, because in his mind, I deserve it. I’d laugh if I didn’t feel like crying.

I’ve reassured him to the best of my ability, told him he can look through all my accounts to see what I’ve written and sent to “Master B.” I have nothing to hide. But Shilo thinks I have some “hidden agenda.” I don’t. I’m battling an overwhelming feeling of sadness and depression and doing my best to muddle through. Blame the time of year. Tomorrow will be 8 years since my Mom’s sudden and unexpected death. It comes down to would I like to see “Master B?” Yes, but not with all the COVID-19 restrictions. Do I miss him? Yes, but I miss LOTS of people, some more than others. Would I rather be with him than Shilo? That’s a trick question, because right now Shilo is currently doing everything in his power to make me miserable, and I don’t like feeling miserable. But in general, no, I’d rather be right here where I am, with my Chosen One and Husband, Shilo. He (Shilo) is my home, “Master B” is my Disneyland. Fun to visit under normal circumstances, but I most certainly wouldn’t want to live there, and after a day or two, I’m more than ready to go home, and right now, home is where I want to be. I just wish Shilo understood that.

 

EDITED TO ADD:

It's a good thing that Shilo has been avoiding the six o'clock alarm, because his anger has rubbed off on me.  I couldn't spank him anyway.

 

Nothing Rhymes With Oranges!

 It's that time of year again! 

My Dear friend and fellow blogger, KD Pierre, (http://collectedsubs.blogspot.com/)  has his annual Holiday Cocktail exchange. This year however, things have been more than a little topsy-turvy, so recipes have been encouraged as well.  I thought about this, and decided why not have it all? So I present to you my recipe for candied orange peel that  gives you 3 (THREE!) treats in one fabulous recipe!

Merry's Candied Orange Peels

3 to 4 large oranges

1½ cups water

3 cups sugar

2 cups sugar

Buy the prettiest oranges you can find. Unblemished and pleasant smelling. Wash the whole orange under running water to get rid of any dirt or residue.

Using a sharp knife, remove the orange peels carefully, then cut the peels into 1/4-inch-wide strips. 

 

Boil peels and 1 cup cold water to a pan, bring to a boil and cook for 15 minutes. Rinse and drain, repeat. (I like to do it a minimum of 3 times)

Add 3 cups sugar and 1½ cups water to a pan. Heat, stirring, until the sugar is dissolved and the syrup is boiling. Add the peels, reduce to a simmer and cook, using a wooden spoon to stir the pan occasionally, for 1 hour. Don’t be like me and get distracted!

 

Place 2 cups of sugar in a medium bowl.

Use a slotted spoon to remove a few of the peels at a time and let the excess syrup drip off for a few seconds. Place the hot, wet peels in the bowl of sugar and toss to coat. Place on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper to set, about 2 hours. Put it in a ziplock bag or a plastic container.

There are many uses for candied orange peel, my favorite being eating it as is, but you can add it to nearly any recipe or even cocktails. Check out Google for ideas.

 

 

Save the syrup to add to your drinks/cocktails for a wonderful kick of citrus flavor!. Save remaining orange infused sugar for special occasions. (I like it in my herbal tea)

ENJOY!

 

Photo Credits 

Orange peel: Me

Naked Chef pictures: Stitch M.

It's Six O'Clock Somewhere...

Hello my people! Whether you are a first-time reader, an occasional reader, or someone who reads everything I write, you are "My" people. You share an interest in whatever I write about, or maybe you show up for the occasional (okay, rare) nudes of myself, Shilo, or one of my other "victims." Either way, happy to have you here!

I've had many changes over the years, including a complete stop of BDSM and Domestic Discipline of my Husband/Chosen One/slave Shilo due to his ongoing problems related to his health. Currently, his Advanced metastatic prostate cancer is under control thanks to his Chemotherapy (an injection every 3 months) and last year's Radiation, although they have some unpleasant side effects. Still better than being dead, and 2 years ago, he only had maybe 2 years to live without treatment, so I'm happy.

Related to all that, Shilo recently decided to talk to his doctor about his desire to engage in sexual activity, and related to that, although not mentioned to the doctor, is his interest in spanking and other related activity has returned. I NEVER, not once, complained about his lack of interest since his diagnosis, because it's not like he has had any control in the matter. This was his decision to do something about it, and I'm glad it was Shilo's decision, because it means a lot to me.

Last week, Shilo sent me an email titled "The Six O'Clock Alarm" and because it is personal, yet relevant, especially to couples who may have reached a point of disinterest, or maybe a dry spell, I wanted to share the email with you.  In the interest of presenting it in my blog, I've changed some You's to me, etc. Please enjoy!

The Six O'Clock Alarm

His phone alarm goes off at 6PM, every day.

Am I in the kitchen, at the computer, in bed, next to him, not home? If I am easy to find, he may ask me something like "You in?" or "You game?"

He will not wake me for this – appointment. If I am asleep, It's canceled. 

IF I am not home, it's canceled. IF I say 'No', with or without a reason, doesn't matter, it's canceled. He can cancel, too, for health issues.

IF we're both in and willing:

He will enter Stitch’s bedroom (on the rare occasion that Stitch might be occupying his bedroom at this particular time, we'll adjust this to our room). Shilo will prepare himself, in terms of state of undress suitable for the temperature, and position himself for a spanking.

Before I enter the bedroom, I will go into the Dining Room to use the dice. There is paper, and a pen nearby. I will roll ONE die, to indicate the number of spanking implements I get to pick. Then I will roll BOTH dice, to indicate how many swats of the each implement.... and write the numbers down. I will continue rolling, one roll for each implement, until my list is complete. (EXAMPLE: I roll a 4, so four implements, and then I roll 10, so ten swats with the first implement, then I roll 3, so three swats with the second, and so on...)

This MAY result in one implement, two swats. This MAY result in six implements, twelve swats each. That's just... the way the dice roll.

I will go into the bedroom, select my implement(s), and (this would be a great time for me to say anything that comes to mind, along the lines of “I'm glad I'm about to spank you, because you did this, or I'm upset about that”), and deliver the indicated number of swats to his anxiously-waiting bare bottom.

I will put down the implement, select my next, employ it, and so on until I have finished with the number of implements indicated, and then I will announce by saying, "Done!" so he knows I’m finished. If I’m feeling nice, I will ask him to pose for pictures for his diary. I might then say, cheerily, "All done!" or perhaps, grumpily, any other words that lets him know he can get up, get dressed, put away implements, etc. He might even offer a 'thank you' of an intimate nature, right after. I may accept or refuse, my choice.

Back to the cancellations mentioned above: If there are three cancellations in any one week period (Sunday to Saturday) we will have a conference to assess the reasons, and decide if the plan is working for us.

Positive to this plan: no guesswork as to the other's mood, no hemming and hawing. No asking or demanding. This is not punishment or discipline, which Shilo resents. For me, this could be therapeutic, I can think about the number of times I wanted to spank him, and he wouldn't cooperate.

Negative to this plan is no spontaneity. Spontaneity has not worked great for us, anyway. No adjustment to the number of swats decided by the dice. If I don't think the number is big enough, I can wait another day. Or lie. He has no way of verifying the numbers that came up on the dice. I might be pissed off by something he did and decide, without rolling any dice, that the numbers are 6x12.

So, my people, what do YOU think? Do you have any thoughts or input?

I will share that I had my doubts, but since that email, we have done this three separate times, and it has worked out well for us.

A "Challenge?"

 One of my favorite guys KD Pierre (https://www.blogger.com/profile/04623475693010155892) recently posted a series of naked people next to the Christmas tree so we could say which one we liked best my "Chosen One" Shilo (https://www.blogger.com/profile/11209310275450354399)  mentioned that one of them had a resemblance to me from the neck down, and she actually won the pick. (http://collectedsubs.blogspot.com/2020/12/winning-vixen.html)

Now, you can see part of my "bounty" in "A Slip of the Nip" (https://keepcalmanddowhatmerrytellsyou.blogspot.com/2020/05/a-slip-of-nip.html) from May this year, and it's perfectly clear she can't possibly be me, given that I have dark brown hair, but there are a few who thought the blonde was me, which, frankly, pisses me off, because blonde is definitely NOT my hair color. 

 

Well, anyway, my tree isn't up yet, but I am considering giving proof that dark brown is MUCH better than blonde for me personally by posting a picture of me by MY tree after it's been put up to end any squabbling once and for all.
 

Until then.... 

Written 11AM PST, November 7, 2020

It's the strangest thing...

 

I woke up and the sun looked brighter today.

The air was sweeter, and there was Krispy Kreme doughnuts and coffee waiting for me, and I felt all my tension leave. It's like a weight was lifted off my shoulders. 

 

Then I turned on the TV and I saw a most glorious sight: We have a new President-Elect!

 

Call me crazy, but I'm so happy that tears are running down my face. My People are safe! My Friends and F/family can live their lives without fear. 

 

People are dancing in the streets of Washington DC, Philadelphia, San Francisco, Boston, Atlanta, and New York to name just a few. Not the crowds of angry protesters of 2016.

 

I hope and pray that this Joy continues.

 

Picture courtesy of my sweetheart Partner-In-Crime, Stitch

 

A Slip of the Nip

It's time for me to post something new, so here's a slip of the nip, and a photo of one of my more recent spankings with a fine gentleman that needed one.

Speaking of OUCH!! I got into a car accident this past Saturday (May 2nd)


Here are pictures of the damage:

 Did I mention that the radiator blew? Anyway, the insurance company towed it to their yard a few days ago, and yesterday they called me and said it was a total loss, which didn't surprise me, but it did surprise Shilo.

Don't worry, I'm fine and while I have LOTS of memories tied up in the car, it's been giving me plenty of worries recently, so maybe it's for the best.

Stay safe everyone!

Merry